Sighhhhhh..... Oh hang on, let me remove the ferocious beast that is currently trying to suck my life out through my ankle bones.
You would never suspect this face to be the spawn of Satan... the Napoleon Bonaparte of Cats would you? |
It is when I'm peaceful that my cat attacks. Oh Satan....I mean Dewey....when will you ever let me be?!
I don't know how many of you have had the privilege, yes it is a privilege, to meet Dewey ( I mean Satan); I'm not sure if you have if that is a good thing or if you should count yourself lucky if you haven't. You see....now how do I put this in the nicest, most polite way possible....Dewey is a little...poo poo head (I have decided to censor myself, because trust me, there are better adjectives out there to describe this special animal).
Satan is a confused animal. There is no way around it, he's actually very dumb. He does this thing with his head where it looks like he's trying to be another member of the Village People and learn the YMCA. I don't understand him. If Edward Cullen was a cat, he would be
Is that a bird? A plane??? no...it's just Dewey flying through the air to attack the Dog.
The Showdown between the small horse and Satan... |
Dewey has no real fear. He's not afraid of me (which he demonstrates every day when he attacks-- I mean ATTACKS-- my toes and my thighs [I just choose to say he has a crush on me...someone's got to right?]) or the dog. Granted, our dog is probably the most feminine male dog you will ever lay eyes upon. I think Dewey is half squirrel...he flies through the air, leaps of furniture onto the back of the unsuspecting dog or human, with the greatest of ease.
Boxing match between the brother and Satan. Satan wins every time |
Now that I've officially established myself in your mind as the crazy cat lady, I think I'll stop my awkward rant about my cat. But he is rude, and I needed to share with you my suffering.
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